home remedy, day 15

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whenever she gets the chance, my mother extols the virtues of vinegar and water. she keeps a jar full in her refrigerator, and i stand here before you swearing that you won’t confuse it for sweet tea but once.

according to my mother, vinegar and water . . .
clears phlegm
clears your head
cures a cough
unstops your ears
settles a stomach
soothes an itch
trims off the pounds
stops allergies
cures sinus infections
erases acne
lowers high cholesterol
lower high blood pressure
brings a rosy glow to your complexion
alleviates acid reflux
and more.

in the same breath, mother will point out that on top of what all it does for your body and health, vinegar and water will also . . .

shine your shoes
shine your hair
whiten your teeth
remove dinginess from clothes
clean windows without leaving streaks
remove water marks from wood
lift stains from carpet
freshen the garbage disposal
polish brass
clean the microwave
deter ants
get the stink out of refrigerators
shoo flies
clean toilet bowls
kill grass
kill weeds
cut the scum off shower doors
prolong the freshness of flowers
make a dog smell better
soften paintbrushes
remove bumper stickers
tenderize meat
remove fruit stains from hands
and more.

i don’t know if it’ll do everything, and i’ll readily admit to having some qualms about putting something into my body that will clean a scorched iron. but i declare, today i feel so bad (i have a cold that i’m SURE i caught from kelly who’s had a cold and obviously forgot to wash her hands before going to the keyboard to tweet and comment, thereby spreading her cold germs to me), i’m minutes before mixing me up some vinegar and water.

in a mayonnaise jar, of course.

7 Comments

  1. angela

    But will it be a Duke’s or a Hellmann’s mayonnaise jar? Just kidding; hope you feel better!

  2. Mrsmediocrity

    🙂 I’m pretty sure that I got it from Cristina… in the same method that you got it from me! I bet Al Gore never figured on germs being able to travel through the internet! Well I use vinegar for the whole second half of your list, I am allergic to most of the cleaning products out there these days so vinegar is my cleaner of choice. And since I’ve had this cold for so long, I’m thinking it sure is worth a try on that as well!

  3. Artemis Retreats

    let me know if it works, speedy healing & hugs

  4. emma

    I’m completely intrigued! White vinegar? And what’s the ratio?
    And re: your cold – feel better soon!! (like by 10pm tonight)
    xo

  5. mary ann reynolds

    Jeanne, does she recommend apple cider vinegar? That’s an old and respected remedy for what ails you. I do it myself almost daily – 2 T vinegar per 12 oz water. I happen to like the taste!

  6. Cristina

    For the record, my germs are cute and cuddly so anybody should love to have them 🙂

  7. Anonymous

    Oh! What mary ann said — apple cider vinegar — that’s what I’ve always heard, too — and another one for your list, I just read somewhere online that apple cider vinegar gets rid of warts as well — wow! Some powerful stuff there!

    This line had me rolling: “you won’t confuse it for sweet tea but once.”

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