self-portrait, 3 (because yes, it’s all about me)

thawing.JPG

 

i’ve never been more sure of anything: i needed a breather. needed to take out my pencil; pen; permanent indelible marker and draw boundaries around my life, around my time, around my desires. now maybe i couldn’t take a full-fledged sabbatical just now, but i could put some space between me and the constant demands on my time and energy. maybe i couldn’t check myself into a monastery, but i could choose how to spend my hours, my words, my attention. in just two short days of saying things like “not now, i’m writing” and “no thank you” and “yes, i would like that” – interspersed with saying absolutely nothing at all – i felt different.

i saw things – ordinary things, things that are undoubtedly there on any given day, just covered up with a flurry of commitments and responsibilities and who knows what all. thoughts came together with delicious ease and clarity. in their relaxing, my shoulders peeled away from my ears. i smiled more.

i’m already looking forward to another, extended quietcation. perhaps next time i’ll take the plastic off my new zafu.

4 Comments

  1. Mrsmediocrity

    I want that. I need that. Sometimes it has to be all about you. It just does.

  2. Cristina

    I love how it’s all about you, because it’s YOU! And we need time to ourselves in order to remember who we are sometimes. Because if we can’t remember who we are, then who will remind us?

  3. Jennifer Prentice

    I cannot tell you how encouraging it is to hear that other people are needing a “break” as well. Thanks for the reminder that it’s up to us to protect our time, say no and take note of the little, everyday wonders around us. XOXO

  4. Barbara

    Boy, do I understand this one! I need a quietcation myself, but there’s no chance for that anytime soon. sigh.

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