not a good girl . . . yet

VinesInHawaii2.JPG

i try to remember to bless

even the crabbiest, scattered, distracted and inattentive people –

really i do.

everybody carries around

their stories of glory

and their stories of grief.

i know they do –

know it, i tell you –

and i have every intention of

blessing them.

 

saturday night in the emergency room

(and all day sunday, too)

i remembered to bless

all the people who bathed us in

positive, loving thoughts and messages.

i remembered to bless my friends

who asked

“do i need to come?”

and the friend from high school

who sent me a private message

containing only his cell phone number.

i remembered to bless

my children

and my mother

and my sibs

who checked in just enough

but not too much.

i even remembered to bless

the dog

who met us at the door

when we got home.

 

but

saturday night in the emergency room

i forgot to bless

the 2 year old who obviously

hadn’t gotten her nap in that day.

i forgot to bless

her parents

who settled into recliners

and let her run around

playing with the hospital computer

and talking to the other people,

also tired and sick,

everyone

(except possibly the 2 year old)

eager to get home.

 

i forgot to bless

the technician who was surprised to hear

that he was about to draw blood

and repeat the test

some 4.5 hours ahead of schedule.

 

i forgot to bless

the nurse who seemed surprised to hear

that she wasn’t supposed to draw blood

from the port they’d inserted hours before.

and i forgot to bless

the obviously ADD

attendant

who came to draw the blood

(at the appointed time)

and was surprised that she’d forgotten to bring

about half the things she needed.

i forgot to bless

the admissions people

who were surprised that we’d slipped right through their cracks,

meaning that some 8 hours later,

we had to do the entry paperwork

so we could do the discharge paperwork

and leave.

 

and for a while

for a short while

right when we first got to the emergency room,

i forgot to bless my husband

who hadn’t told me

that he’d started taking

blood pressure medicine

about a month ago.

 

it’s monday now,

and i’m thinking

that blessings don’t have

a shelf life

or expiration date,

 

so maybe i’ll just post-bless them all –

even the ones i’ve already

blessed repeatedly –

and i’ll start afresh

and again

to remember to bless

everybody,

every

single

person

no matter what

adjectives i attach to them.

 

(well, almost everybody.

cause

honestly,

i don’t think i’ll ever

be that good.)

 

 

 

 

21 Comments

  1. Square-Peg Karen

    Oh, Jeanne – the picture you put to the post — how apropos! I'm looking at how all the branches/threads connect to the whole, how so many of them connect to each other — and it's making me smile.

    I'm also thinking of Mary Oliver's Wild Geese poem — with “you don't have to be good…”

    love this! love that you're BACK from the hospital!!

  2. whollyjeanne

    just seeing your name pop up makes me smile. and your fb message(s) during our saturday night adventure made me smile, too. they still are.

  3. Amanda F.

    I loved this. Every word. I was so worried when I heard you were hanging out in the hospital. And listen to you blessing everyone, regardless of how irritating or incompetent they were. You are a true gem. xo

  4. AlanaSheeren

    I loved this too 🙂 Having just had my own recent trip to the ER, I think I have some post-blessing to do. Sending love to you and hubby. Glad the adventure was just that.

  5. susanreep

    Oh, Jeanne, yes. Hard to remember, isn't it? In traffic I look at the guy in such a hurry, darting around cars, and try to remember to think – maybe he had a bad day, maybe there's an emergency. Of course, maybe he's just a jerk, but then he's doing the best he can with who he is. Thanks for your post. I'll try to be more aware. And all is well? Scary in the ER.

  6. Julie Daley

    Oh, Jeanne. I must have missed all the postings. I hope you are both okay.
    Your post is beautiful, like you.
    One question, did you remember to bless yourself? No shelf life on that, either…
    Sending you blessings, darling,
    Julie

  7. PicsieChick

    Tears. Bless you. (even though it's embarassing to cry at work).

    You are so generous. Thank you for this.

    I hope that the entire issue is fully resolved with complete healing….and I'm sending you some butterflies to help with the heating in case you need them.

    Hugs, too
    ~T~

  8. emma

    Oh my goodness… what?!? I had no idea this had happened, and I'm so very, very glad everything turned out okay – it DID, right? Lots of love to you and hubs!!

    And this is beautiful – raw, honest and full of love and life.

    xoxo

  9. whollyjeanne

    takes a gem to know a gem . . . xo

  10. whollyjeanne

    oh, lord. i hope everything's okay with you and yours now. a trip to the er is something i'd wish for only a handful of people (those i just can't bless, period.)

  11. whollyjeanne

    it is unbelievably hard to remember. i wish i was this saint-like kind of girl, but i'm just not. sigh.

  12. whollyjeanne

    julie daley, i love you. that is all.

  13. whollyjeanne

    awwwww. you make me laugh and cry, both.

  14. mrsmediocrity

    Now, finally that I have a moment…first, I truly hope that everything is okay…I gather from what you wrote that it is, but just wanted to be sure. Second, you are good, for even caring enough about it afterward to back and bless…I so get what you said, my parents have been in and out of the hospital in the past year for a variety of issues and oh, it is so difficult to not lose your patience. As years go by and I am quite sure that several doctors and nurses will be sorry they ever met me, I am the one that reminds them what they forgot, that medication hasn't been delivered yet, that I will not let them be incompetent. I don't know if you ever saw my post on Mrs. M about my bad medical year, (it is here if you are bored and want to listen to me rant: http://www.mrsmediocrity.com/?p=882) but since then, I have no tolerance for doctors that can't take the time to be thorough. Okay, I'm done. Don't get me started on this particular topic…but really, let me know that all is well once again, cause I can't be a mrs. sandwich without the and.

  15. whollyjeanne

    still working on the health issue. thanks and xo, my friend.

  16. mrsmediocrity

    p.s., love your photo!

  17. olive & hope

    I am sending much love and healing thoughts, lots of wonderous wishes, and a big hug via the interwebs. All there is to say is that I adore you, and I hope that you did add yourself to the blessings list as Julie suggested. I hope that your hubby is back to the best of health right away. You and your blessings knock my socks off. seriously.

  18. whollyjeanne

    well, like i said: i'm no card-carrying good girl yet. i have long-standing issues with the medical industry, and i'll admit that having just read this particular post just now, it reads like something out of the pages of Passive Aggressive for Dummies. like you, i will not let doctors or nurses or attendants or technicians be incompetent, and truth be known: some are. and i hate feeling like i can't be honest about it for political reasons: for fear they'll flag my file and deliberately mistreat my famdamily. god knows, it's bad enough when i'm anonymous.

    okay, breathing. blessing. breathing. blessing . . .

  19. whollyjeanne

    thanks, danette. you render me sockless, too.

  20. whollyjeanne

    thanks. it's vines growing up an exterior wall at the getty museum in la. sometimes the best art is outside the 4 walls . . .

  21. Tracy

    Dang… how can I ever thank @mrsmediocrity for telling me about you?

    Dang, I owe her one big time.

    To you: sending the best, offering little but well wishes and heartfelt best thoughts.

    Sign me, bookmarking you,
    @mstracybrown
    and 1/2 of @happinessinside

Pull up a chair why don't you, and let's talk . . .

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Where in the world is The 70273 Project? Please add a pin to show us where you are in the world. (1) Click the + sign in upper righthand corner of map. (2) Enter your first name only. (3) Enter your city/state. (4) Using the pins at the bottom of the map, select a marker based on how you are involved. (5) Select preview to see before posting. (6) Select submit to post. Please add a marker for each role you serve in The 70273 Project.

Support The 70273 Project

teaching

special delivery: get blog posts hot off the press

supporting

upscale homeless: my son's easy shop

upscale homeless:
my son's etsy shop

categories

archives

© 2022 Jeanne Hewell-Chambers’ Barefoot Heart

Theme by Anders NorenUp ↑

%d bloggers like this: