19: If This, Then That


As A Child:

When I got in trouble at school, I got in twice as much trouble at home. And to make it even worse, I got in trouble all the way home because Back Then, everybody helped turn out a fine, upstanding member of society. I remembered how embarrassed I was that everybody and their mother knew I’d misbehaved, and I walked the straight and narrow from then on.

When I ate too much ice cream, my stomach hurt, so the next time I went Day’s Drug Store, I only ordered 5 scoops.

When I said something mean to somebody, I couldn’t go to sleep that night, so learned to count to ten.

When I overspent my 50-cents a week allowance, I had to do without until next Allowance Pay Day, so I learned to plan ahead and budget my allowance.

When I didn’t clean my plate, little children in China starved.

When I played close to the lawn mower, I got hit by rocks.

When I crossed my eyes, I ran the risk of them staying like that.

When I ran my hand through the candle flame, I got burned, so I made a point of not doing that again.

When I didn’t study for a test, I made a bad grade, so I learned to keep a calendar – a study schedule – and abide by it.

When I said a bad word, I got my mouth washed out with soap.

When I ate a plate of French fries, my skirts wouldn’t zip up . . . so I learned to eat only half a plate.

When I threw my childhood dirty clothes on the floor and left them there instead of putting them in the laundry hamper, I ran out of clean cloths, and before long, I learned to put the clothes in the hamper.

When I knocked on the hornet’s nest with a stick, I got stung.

As An Adult:

When I didn’t pay the phone bill, my phone was turned off, so I developed a system to make sure that didn’t happen again.

When I washed my car, it rained.

When I didn’t return library books on time, the librarian looked over her glasses at me and announced my fine total on the intercom, so I made sure to return or renew them from then on.

When I didn’t feed the cats, they sat on my face while I slept.

When I left the house without makeup on, I ran into everybody I knew.


I went in a store to purchase one of those long-necked lighters you used for candles and grills, and I had to show my driver’s license. Yes, really. Shoot, anybody who looks at me can tell I’m old enough to play with fire.

Once upon a time, consequences were our best teachers. Still could be if we’d let them.

1 Comment

  1. moon

    The consequences of fire.. Love this…

Pull up a chair why don't you, and let's talk . . .

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Where in the world is The 70273 Project? Please add a pin to show us where you are in the world. (1) Click the + sign in upper righthand corner of map. (2) Enter your first name only. (3) Enter your city/state. (4) Using the pins at the bottom of the map, select a marker based on how you are involved. (5) Select preview to see before posting. (6) Select submit to post. Please add a marker for each role you serve in The 70273 Project.

Support The 70273 Project

Allow me to introduce myself . . .

Hey, Sugar! I'm Jeanne Hewell-Chambers: writer ~ stitcher ~ storyteller ~ one-woman performer ~ creator & founder of The 70273 Project, and I'm mighty glad you're here. Make yourself at home, and if you have any questions, just holler.

special delivery: get blog posts hot off the press


© 2024 Jeanne Hewell-Chambers’ Barefoot Heart

Theme by Anders NorenUp ↑