i’ve fallen into challenge and i can’t get up

FeetRootsNHollywood.jpg

a snap of tree roots growing in north hollywood, california that look like feet to me. guess it’s all in how you look at things.

just writing this post proves a challenge of the first order as i try to get it from becoming a flat-out pity party.

other top contenders include:

* we moved this year.
* the holidays: overspending.
* the holidays: feeling melancholy instead of the generally preferred (by others) festive.
* the holidays: decorating followed by the dreaded un.
* the holidays: greetings, as in continuing to wish folks a “happy, happy” when around here, anyway, using anything but “merry christmas” can draw blood.
* a to do list that’s about to implode and involve collateral damage.
* settling the estate of a precious, much-loved, childless 97 year-old great-aunt who had two not-really-so-dear-but-just-as-childless-and-tenaciously-long-lived predeceased sisters (a.k.a. you never saw so much stuff).
* learning del.icio.us (the “damn” is implied).
* creating digital social faux pas’es. (which is the way i think you indicate plural, as in a few more than several).
* not sounding too eager when digitally meeting new people.
* not sounding too lackadaisical when digitally meeting new people.
* my weight.
* those little critical, naysaying voices.
* juggling what i need to do with what i want – and vice versa.

i have written this post several times now. the first draft was a clever little ditty about the boot camp i just finished. (or would have had my back not gotten all messed up). the 2nd draft was a wordy wrangle about how the challenge of how much a private girl like me should actually reveal and why opening yourself up is always risky. the edit stage of that version is when i realized my real challenge was how not to appear/feel like a poor-little-me girl. and just now, as i was polishing this off, comes a text message from a friend who underwent surgery for a hernia today telling me they found cancer. and right on the heels of that a call from my brother telling me that his stepson’s face and neck came in direct contact with a full-charged and running drill motor, requiring some 67 stitches on the outside and i-don’t-know-how many on the inside.

so.

now i realize 2 things:
1) in the best interest of myself and everybody else, i HAVE to get this challenge piece posted and move on

and

2) i don’t really have any challenges worthy of note. (but thanks for listening.)

#best09

~~~

the story is mine, but credit for the kindling goes to gwen bell and her best of 2009 blog challenge.
~~~

Technorati Tags:
#best09, #bestof2009

18 Comments

  1. emma

    I find this post utterly delightful, and hope your 2010 turns all those alluded to frowns upside down 🙂

    And that tree absolutely has feet!

    • jeanne

      emma, somehow i knew you’d see the feet!

  2. emma

    I find this post utterly delightful, and hope your 2010 turns all those alluded to frowns upside down 🙂

    And that tree absolutely has feet!

    • jeanne

      emma, somehow i knew you’d see the feet!

  3. Kate T.W.

    They look like Big Bird’s feet to me. I like to be cheerful, and holidays can have me absolutely maudlin. Every time someone acknowledges holiday malaise I think it makes it a bit easier for the rest of us to have compassion for our own bah hum-bug moments.

    Thanks for the post!

    • jeanne

      you know, kate, this is the first year i’ve come right out and mentioned my holiday melancholy. sure makes me feel better (not festive, but better) to own it. and i do always feel relieved when someone else at least has a bag humbug moment and tells about it.

  4. Kate T.W.

    They look like Big Bird’s feet to me. I like to be cheerful, and holidays can have me absolutely maudlin. Every time someone acknowledges holiday malaise I think it makes it a bit easier for the rest of us to have compassion for our own bah hum-bug moments.

    Thanks for the post!

    • jeanne

      you know, kate, this is the first year i’ve come right out and mentioned my holiday melancholy. sure makes me feel better (not festive, but better) to own it. and i do always feel relieved when someone else at least has a bag humbug moment and tells about it.

  5. Square-Peg Karen

    Ahhhh….wild, i’m late here, so I”m offering nothing new — what Kate T.W. said – Big Bird’s feet – yep…and what she said about the malaise..yea..and what emma said – about hoping your 2010 turns the frowns upside down – hell, yea!!

    Don’t know about you, but i get the spirit the day AFTER all the holiday hooha..what is up with THAT?

    Jeanne…the do-overs of your post — can’t tell you how many times what I end with is NOT what I started with – odd, like life…

    So glad you shared this, and here’s to a sweet resolution to all the “contenders” in the list!!

    • whollyjeanne

      starting out in one place and winding up somewhere else. yep, karen, that pretty much sums up my life. (and i’m not necessarily complaining.)

  6. Square-Peg Karen

    Ahhhh….wild, i’m late here, so I”m offering nothing new — what Kate T.W. said – Big Bird’s feet – yep…and what she said about the malaise..yea..and what emma said – about hoping your 2010 turns the frowns upside down – hell, yea!!

    Don’t know about you, but i get the spirit the day AFTER all the holiday hooha..what is up with THAT?

    Jeanne…the do-overs of your post — can’t tell you how many times what I end with is NOT what I started with – odd, like life…

    So glad you shared this, and here’s to a sweet resolution to all the “contenders” in the list!!

    • whollyjeanne

      starting out in one place and winding up somewhere else. yep, karen, that pretty much sums up my life. (and i’m not necessarily complaining.)

  7. Lisa

    I’m glad you shared this …. along with all that you share. I can SO relate. Thank you ….

  8. Lisa

    I’m glad you shared this …. along with all that you share. I can SO relate. Thank you ….

  9. whollyjeanne

    thanks, lisa. i’m headed over to your place to catch-up.

  10. whollyjeanne

    thanks, lisa. i’m headed over to your place to catch-up.

  11. Stacie

    Just found your blogs and been reading through. You are awesome, love your writing and your attitude!

    Funny how life turns around some times and you see things in a different way. Been there myself, often. While bad things happen to others and make your problems seem small, your problems are still important too 🙂

    I wish you a wonderful New Year’s Eve and that 2010 brings you much joy and happiness!

  12. Stacie

    Just found your blogs and been reading through. You are awesome, love your writing and your attitude!

    Funny how life turns around some times and you see things in a different way. Been there myself, often. While bad things happen to others and make your problems seem small, your problems are still important too 🙂

    I wish you a wonderful New Year’s Eve and that 2010 brings you much joy and happiness!

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