fruits just aren’t my color

this is what i dream my life will look like:

japanesegardenbridge.jpg

this is what it usually looks like by the end of any given day:

roastedpig.jpg

(hint: it’s a pig that’s been slaughtered, stuffed, and buried with hot coals.)

and i’m working on changing that.
it’s just that reprogramming a lifetime of
ingrained influences
takes a while.
longer than i expected, actually.
but i’m on it
(most of the time)
cause really,
i don’t look that good in
pineapple.

30 Comments

  1. Christa Avampato

    Jeanne, I so understand this journey. You keep that gorgeous image in your mind and keep going. I’m cheering you on!!
    .-= Christa Avampato´s last blog ..Step 48: Usefulness =-.

    • whollyjeanne

      thanks, christa. read your post right after i hit the publish button here, and that, my friend, is an example of what we call excellent timing.
      .-= whollyjeanne´s last blog ..nancy, an unlikely shero =-.

  2. Christa Avampato

    Jeanne, I so understand this journey. You keep that gorgeous image in your mind and keep going. I’m cheering you on!!
    .-= Christa Avampato´s last blog ..Step 48: Usefulness =-.

    • whollyjeanne

      thanks, christa. read your post right after i hit the publish button here, and that, my friend, is an example of what we call excellent timing.
      .-= whollyjeanne´s last blog ..nancy, an unlikely shero =-.

  3. Jennifer Prentice

    It’s so interesting how different our lives actually turn out as compared to how we initially pictured them when we were younger. And you’re right. It’s difficult to train our minds think a different way after years of thinking that life be one way–or years of life “beating us down” in general. Short, simple, poignant post. I love it.
    XOXO, Jeanne.
    .-= Jennifer Prentice´s last blog ..Taking the Self Out of Love =-.

  4. thewordwire

    Well, I bet you do look good in pineapple… just not standing over a slaughtered pig being buried with hot coals. Sorry you feel that way at the end of the day sometimes – Here’s to finding that dreamlike spot in your photo.
    .-= thewordwire´s last blog ..How To Swim When You’ve Jumped Off The Face Of A Cliff =-.

  5. Square-Peg Karen

    Jeanne, this cracked me up!! the whole thing — the darling la-di-da bridge picture and then ohmy – lol – that poor pig. You got me smiling! And I agree with thewordwire, I just bet you DO look good in pineapple! And Jeanne, I SO get the thing about the difference between what we dream and what we live – grin (and sigh).
    .-= Square-Peg Karen´s last blog ..Go Touch Hearts =-.

  6. Square-Peg Karen

    Jeanne, this cracked me up!! the whole thing — the darling la-di-da bridge picture and then ohmy – lol – that poor pig. You got me smiling! And I agree with thewordwire, I just bet you DO look good in pineapple! And Jeanne, I SO get the thing about the difference between what we dream and what we live – grin (and sigh).
    .-= Square-Peg Karen´s last blog ..Go Touch Hearts =-.

  7. Jennifer Prentice

    It’s so interesting how different our lives actually turn out as compared to how we initially pictured them when we were younger. And you’re right. It’s difficult to train our minds think a different way after years of thinking that life be one way–or years of life “beating us down” in general. Short, simple, poignant post. I love it.
    XOXO, Jeanne.
    .-= Jennifer Prentice´s last blog ..Taking the Self Out of Love =-.

  8. TheWordWire

    Well, I bet you do look good in pineapple… just not standing over a slaughtered pig being buried with hot coals. Sorry you feel that way at the end of the day sometimes – Here’s to finding that dreamlike spot in your photo.
    .-= thewordwire´s last blog ..How To Swim When You’ve Jumped Off The Face Of A Cliff =-.

  9. emma

    There is so much I want to say, but it will wait til we’re sitting on your porch drinking iced tea (assuming you have a porch). You are the bees knees, and your journey is so beautiful it gives me goosebumps. Stay in the kind-to-yourself zone and trust that you will have many, many moments of that gorgeous serenity you seek. That being said, have some fun playing in the dirt too, just maybe not in pineapple. xoxo
    .-= emma´s last blog ..Tibet Revisited =-.

  10. emma

    There is so much I want to say, but it will wait til we’re sitting on your porch drinking iced tea (assuming you have a porch). You are the bees knees, and your journey is so beautiful it gives me goosebumps. Stay in the kind-to-yourself zone and trust that you will have many, many moments of that gorgeous serenity you seek. That being said, have some fun playing in the dirt too, just maybe not in pineapple. xoxo
    .-= emma´s last blog ..Tibet Revisited =-.

  11. Anonymous

    It does take a while, doesn’t it!? Sometimes I get pretty impatient for that first picture! But as long as we keep “working to change it” – there is hope. Besides, think of all the fun we have trying to get there!
    .-= Shawna Cevraini´s last blog ..Just Another Ordinary Miracle =-.

  12. Shawna Cevraini

    It does take a while, doesn’t it!? Sometimes I get pretty impatient for that first picture! But as long as we keep “working to change it” – there is hope. Besides, think of all the fun we have trying to get there!
    .-= Shawna Cevraini´s last blog ..Just Another Ordinary Miracle =-.

  13. olive & hope

    Oh Jeanne I adore you! And miss you terribly since I’ve been staying away…The beauty is in the journey isn’t it? I wonder if in the end, (after all of our digging is done) we’ll find that the most beautiful stuff was buried under the hot coals, dirt, and ash?

    I am picturing you dancing around with a hat made from the top of a pineapple – and you look pretty good to me! 😉 xo
    .-= olive & hope´s last blog ..Giving Away a Spot in An Experiment in Radical Creativity! =-.

  14. olive & hope

    Oh Jeanne I adore you! And miss you terribly since I’ve been staying away…The beauty is in the journey isn’t it? I wonder if in the end, (after all of our digging is done) we’ll find that the most beautiful stuff was buried under the hot coals, dirt, and ash?

    I am picturing you dancing around with a hat made from the top of a pineapple – and you look pretty good to me! 😉 xo
    .-= olive & hope´s last blog ..Giving Away a Spot in An Experiment in Radical Creativity! =-.

  15. Alicia

    it definitely takes effort and LOTS of remedial consistency esp. where those lifelong habits and imprints are concerned. thinking well of you…

  16. whollyjeanne

    ah, the wise voice of experience. my friend, acey. “remedial consistency”. yes. and nicely put.

  17. whollyjeanne

    ah, yes. i forget that there's some beautiful stuff buried under the hot coals, dirt and ash. thanks for the reminder.

  18. whollyjeanne

    what is it they say – rome wasn't changed in a day?

  19. whollyjeanne

    well, sugar, i look forward to that day when we sit on my front porch and drink – ahem, tea. yes, i have a porch – and 2 rocking chairs just waiting for us.

  20. shoreacres

    That bridge does look pretty good. Of course, there's always the possibility the pig tastes pretty good, too. This, of course, is the perspective of someone who had the bridge waiting for her but decided it would be so ever much more fun to go running off into the bush in pursuit of the pig.

  21. whollyjeanne

    now i'm intrigued.

  22. what can i do to get pregnant

    My mother had just gotten out of the hospital and was recuperating. For the next twenty years I never said a word…to anyone. My fear of being attacked again for something I couldn’t help, such as my natural looks or the color of my hair, or shape of …

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