+ Her Barefoot Heart

Category: writings (Page 12 of 66)

52: Ink, Paper, Stamps – Remember Them?

StrattonLoveLetter1

The letters – written on khaki-colored YMCA stationery – begin with loving salutations like “My Dear Byrdie” and “My Own Dear Baby” and “My Dear Sweetheart”. They close with a little more formality: “With all good wishes, I am” and “I am as ever” though occasionally a little sweetness creeps in: “Yours until death” and “With all my love and kisses”. He signs them as “A. J. Jack Stratton.”

ByrdieAndJack1

ByrdieAndJack2

Andrew Jack Stratton (The Engineer’s grandfather, affectionally called Pops) penned the letters to Jakie Byrd Wright (The Engineer’s grandmother, affectionately known as Maw) as he wooed, then courted, and eventually married her on April 20, 1918, a scant three months before he shipped out to France to take his place in history by serving as a Doughboy in the American Expeditionary Force (AEF) of World War I.

StrattonLoveLettersBundle1

In late 2000, I found the bundle of love letters Pops wrote his new bride during World War I, all 67 letters held together with a piece of orange yarn. They are so precious and such a treasure of family history, I set about replicating a set for each family member, scanning the letters and creating a collage of scanned stamps, postmarks, and addresses that I printed then cut, folded, and glued into envelopes. Once all the letters had been recreated and stuffed into envelopes, I tied them together with a piece of orange yarn and put each set in one of the antique wooden boxes I’d been quietly collecting.

StrattonLoveLettersBooklet2

Because some of the letters were near illegible, I transcribed each one and put together a little book along with the little research I had time to do about the places and events mentioned in the letters. As I worked, I channeled Pops and Maw through the silver Mont Blanc fountain pen that Pops actually used to write the letters, his name inscribed on the barrel.

Newlyweds1

Through his letters, we get to know the young Jack and the woman he loves, Jakie Byrd. We witness his flirting, his declarations of undying love, his pledges to stay away from the French wines. We are with him when he checks in at Camp Lee, as he petitions his Captain with a plan to get his sweetheart to visit, and later as he finally sees land from the boat as he arrives in Europe. We feel his homesickness, his angst at not being promoted, his eagerness to “show the Kaiser what the US boys can do.”

SoldierJack1

SoldierJack2

The centenary of World War I began in 2014 and continues through 2018, so it seems a fine time to dust off the letters and give them another read. Maybe do some more extensive research about where and how he served. Though the letters are deliberately devoid of details and effusive emotion to allow them to pass through the hands of censors, much can still be gleaned about Pops, Maw, and so-called War to End All Wars, and the climate of America at the time. We know so much about history thanks to handwritten letters, and I fear how much will be lost to future generations because, really, who’s going to sit down and sift through the thousands of emails in our computers? Preserving history – especially primary source history – is not an expenditure of time, but an investment. So let’s get out the pens and paper and write more letters. It’s a fine legacy to leave, and our posterity will thank us. I’m sure of it.

~~~~~~~

IOOL4 18JPG

In Our Own Language 4:18

Nancy (my developmentally disabled sister-in-law) draws.
I (the woman who flat-out loves her) stitch.

~~~~~~~

DailyDahlia21Sep15

The Daily Dahlia

~~~~~~~

Hey, I’m sure glad you’re here.
To see more of the Daily Dahlias, join me on Facebook or Instagram.
And if you want to keep up with these 100 Stories in 100 Days
or my stitchings,
just mash the black “right this way” button in the orange bar
at the top of the screen and follow the directions.

51: The Eyes Have It

She’d been a writer
since discovering the written word in first grade,
so it’s no wonder she sat in a corner at their twentieth reunion,
watching her former classmates and
sketching them in lines and words. . .

CuteLittleCreature copy

One gal had a bad cold which kinda’ made her look like a clown.
About all she could mutter intelligibly was “Oh”,
so she sounded constantly surprised.
Or sad, depending.

DidntBelieveAWordSheSaid copy

JoeBob sought her out
and apologized
for having stood her up the night of their Senior Prom.
It may have been twenty years ago,
but Cleotia still didn’t believe a single word he said.

EyesBuggedOutOfHerHead copy

While some people needed name tags to recognize former classmates,
everybody recognized Bernice immediately
because the years hadn’t reduced the size
or placement
of her eyes.
Not one little bit.

FlirtyEyes copy

In the some-stereotypes-never-change department,
the captain of the cheerleading squad
spent the entire night giving flirty eyes
to the captain of the football team.

GrouchoEyes copy

The older he got,
the more he looked like Groucho Marx.
Everybody said so.

LoungeLizardette copy

While other folks went off to college,
Peony stayed home and became a Lounge Lizard.

MadAndUnconvinced copy

Even though Diotra spent the better part of every hour
trying to convince Dilbo that he,
the man she came to the reunion with
not the fourth grade fella
who’d helped her craft that flour and water map of Italy,
was the true love of her life,
he remained steadfastly mad and unconvinced.

OneEyedBeaked copy

Flossie Belle took home the Most Unchanged ribbon
for the way she still reminded everybody
of the school mascot:
of a rarified one-eyed beaked
ornamonfagnothingazimbo.

OneEyeListensWithHeartPortraitPose copy

The years had not been kind to Hybrid.
Neither was that fascinator she wore perched up on her head.

OwlEyes1 copy

Twinkle Towez may have had the eyes and the stutter of an owl,
possibly even the night vision,
but when she opened her mouth and started talking,
it became glaringly obvious that
the owl analogy stopped there.

Peeking copy

Those unfortunate close-set squinty eyes,
gave everybody the impression that Leotia had trust issues.
Or allergies.

SadEyesBeingWatched copy

A couple of girls from the Glee Club
sat in the corner and cried all night
at the inevitable conclusion
that their lives had peaked in seventh grade.

She1 copy

The accident left Pet R. Fried with
a swollen, stitched-up right eye,
a blackened left eye,
a mouth sewn shut,
a chin that would need several more surgeries to take in the slack,
and the in-and-out ports on his chest.
But you had to give him bonus points
for donning a tie
and coming to the reunion anyway.

She2 copy

Su Songbird had this way of looking right through you.
It was unnerving, really.

WaitedUpAllNight copy

Jim Beamtofroid was up drinking all night the night before,
and it kinda’ showed.

WearySleep copy

One cup of punch,
and LizaMae was snoring over her cheese straws.

WinkingEyes1 copy

Bette wished
she could’ve gotten in that class
on how to draw better eyebrows
before the reunion.
Her classmates did, too.

WiseGuyAlwaysTalking copy

When Junior got to drinking,
he looked a whole lot less like Clark Gable
and a whole lot more like Captain Hook in a jester’s hat.

~~~~~~~

IOOL4 17

In Our Own Language 4:17

And if I haven’t worn your imagination slap out,
tell me what (if anything)
you see in this stitched version of Nancy’s drawing.
Nancy (my developmentally disabled sister-in-law) draws.
I (the woman who flat-out loves her) stitch her drawings.

~~~~~~~

DailyDahlia20Sep15

The Daily Dahlia

~~~~~~~

Thank you for joining me on my story quest.
To see more of the Daily Dahlias, join me on Facebook or Instagram.
And if you want to keep up with these 100 Stories in 100 Days
or my stitchings,
just mash the black “right this way” button in the orange bar
at the top of the screen and follow the directions.

50: Memorization, The Brain Food of Champions

DailyDahlia19sept15

(The Daily Dahlia)

A Morning Offering

I bless the night that nourished my heart
To set the ghosts of longing free
Into the flow and figure of dream
That went to harvest from the dark
Bread for the hunger no one sees.

All that is eternal in me
Welcome the wonder of this day,
The field of brightness it creates
Offering time for each thing
To arise and illuminate.

I place on the altar of dawn:
The quiet loyalty of breath,
The tent of thought where I shelter,
Wave of desire I am shore to
And all beauty drawn to the eye.

May my mind come alive today
To the invisible geography
That invites me to new frontiers,
To break the dead shell of yesterdays,
To risk being disturbed and changed.

May I have the courage today
To live the life that I would love,
To postpone my dream no longer
But do at last what I came here for
And waste my heart on fear no more.

~ John O’Donohue ~

~~~

In her late 90s,
Aunt Lucile still recites the ditties and poems
she learned in primary school.
Though she’d kill me if I told you her age,
I think my mother would be okay with me telling you
that she can still recall the words to
a little something she memorized
in elementary school: Thanatopsis.
It’s not exactly light fare even for an adult,
and she admits she didn’t have any idea
what it was about when she chose it.
It was the level of difficulty that made her select it.

Once upon a lifetime,
memorization was a part of the curriculum.
I think it should be brought back.

Some people do crossword puzzles to exercise their brain.
Me? I memorize.
And this beautiful Morning Offering
is what I’m currently weaving into my soul.

~~~~~~~

IOOL4 16

In Our Own Language 4:16

And here’s today’s installment of the Nancy and Jeanne collaboration.
Nancy (my developmentally disabled sister-in-law) draws.
I (the woman who flat-out loves her) stitch her drawings.

~~~~~~~

Thank you for joining me on my story quest.
To see more of the Daily Dahlias, join me on Facebook or Instagram.
And if you want to keep up with these 100 Stories in 100 Days
or my stitchings,
just mash the black “right this way” button in the orange bar
at the top of the screen and follow the directions.

49: Today, A Different Kind of Remembering

Copperpowmiabracelet

I wore one in undergraduate school – a POW MIA bracelet. I don’t remember the name on it, just that I wore it every single day (even though it turned my wrist green). I thought of that copper bracelet today as we observed National POW/MIA Recognition Day and wondered if my veteran (He was a Lt., that’s all I remember) had ever been found.

POWMIACeremony2015a

Four decades after he went missing, one local Vietnam veteran – Senior Master Sgt. Gary Pate, a 1964 Fayette County High School graduate – was found. Those who knew Gary say that his thoughts were focused on the future even as he faced death every single day in Vietnam. He got engaged, was having his wedding suit made, and the couple had ordered their china. By all accounts, he was looking forward to the life he would live when he came home. On May 22, 1968, Pate’s C-130 Hercules crashed in the enemy-riddled jungle. No body was ever discovered, no flag-draped casket was shipped home, and nothing was known except that his plane went down, taking all crew members with it.

The war eventually ended, but the U. S. Air Force refused to give up, continuing to search for POWs and MIAs. Forty-one years later the Air Force found dog tags belonging to Gary Pate. Gary’s remains and the remains of his seven fellow crew men are buried together in a single coffin in Arlington National Cemetery.

Today The Engineer, Alison, and I attended a ceremony dedicated to remembering the men and women who remain on the POW/MIA list of all wars, and let me tell you: the numbers are staggering. It would take a lot of fingers and toes to add them all up. A lot.

POWMIAMissingManTable2

At this morning’s ceremony, a wreath was laid, the flag was flown, and the richly symbolic Missing Man table was set. The table is round to show our everlasting concern. An empty white (purity of intentions) chair represents the POW/MIA who is unable to join us at the table. The glass is inverted because they are unable to join us in a toast. A single red rose reminds us of the lives of these Americans and of their loved ones who continue to worry and wonder. A slice of lemon is on the table to remind us of their bitter fate, a pinch of salt symbolizes tears, and a lighted candle reflects our hope for their return . . . dead or alive. It was quite moving – the table, the stories, the numbers, and I’m glad we went. The entire ceremony lasted about twenty minutes.

Forty-one years.

Twenty minutes.

Time well spent.

~~~~~~~

IOOL4 16

In Our Own Language 4:16

I’m still stitching stories, too.
Nancy (my developmentally disabled sister-in-law) draws.
I (the woman who flat-out loves her) stitch her drawings.

~~~~~~~

DailyDahlia18Sep15

The Daily Dahlia

~~~~~~~

Thank you for joining me on my story quest.
To see more of the Daily Dahlias, join me on Facebook or Instagram.
And if you want to keep up with these 100 Stories in 100 Days
or my stitchings,
just mash the black “right this way” button in the orange bar
at the top of the screen and follow the directions.

48: He Were Never in the Family Photos, but He Was There Somewhere

BillFishing003 copy

My family had a thing about goats.

Yes, goats. Real goats. As in billy goat goats.

My Uncle Gene had a goat whose name was, of all things, Bill. (I think we can all safely say that I got my name from my Uncle Gene but not my creativity.) Now Bill was known to open the back screen door and come on into the house, and Granddaddy was known to lay out his farming clothes before he left for work at the bank every morning. One day Bill came in to get out of the heat of the afternoon and spied Granddaddy’s “dungarees” as Granddaddy’s sister called them, laying on the bed. Bill was either hungry or tired – we’ll never know for sure exactly what motivated him – but either way, he chewed off more than half of both pants leg before he wore himself out and went to sleep in the middle of Granddaddy’s bed.

Granddaddy was not amused.

And Bill was no longer hungry or tired.

Then there was the time my Uncle Bill (that’s him up there in the photo, fishing.) came to show off his new champagne colored Ford Falcon. It had that new car smell and that new car shine. Once everybody had been to ride in the new car, they settled inside the house for a glass of sweet tea. As they talked, there commenced the loudest BAM you ever heard. Then another BAM. And another, and another.

By the time they got outside, Billy Goat Bill had torn the right side of Uncle Bill’s new car to smithereens. Why, passengers had to get in on the driver’s side and crawl over to take a seat in what little passenger space was left cause Billy Goat Bill had done such damage on the door.

The way the story has come down the line is that there he was – Billy Goat Bill – minding his own business when he happened by the shiny new car, saw himself in the reflection, took exception to another billy goat trespassing on his home turf, and launched a full-out attack.

On the car, as it turns out.

Which Billy Goat Bill thought was the stubbornest goat he’d ever come across.

And by the time they tore Billy Boat Bill off of Uncle Bill’s new car, Billy Goat Bill was ready for another nap on Granddaddy’s bed.

~~~~~~~

IOOL4 15 copy

In Our Own Language 4:15

I’m still stitching stories, too.
Nancy (my developmentally disabled sister-in-law) draws.
I (the woman who flat-out loves her) stitch her drawings.

~~~~~~~

DailyDahlia17Sep15

The Daily Dahlia

~~~~~~~

Thank you for joining me on my story quest.
To see more of the Daily Dahlias, join me on Facebook or Instagram.
And if you want to keep up with these 100 Stories in 100 Days
or my stitchings,
just mash the black “right this way” button in the orange bar
at the top of the screen and follow the directions.

47: When It Comes to Hearing, the Size of the Ears Means Nothing

WmKatieBelleBallard50Ann

William and Katie Belle Ballard
(shown here on the occasion of their 50th wedding anniversary)

Griffin, GA was once a big city compared to Fayetteville, GA, and we went there to shop for clothes at Saul’s downtown and at Mrs. Sailor’s in the little storage building behind her antebellum home on the way to downtown. For socks, towels, under garments, and all hosiery needs, we went to The Sock Shoppe. Saul’s and Mrs. Sailor’s are now mere memories, but The Sock Shoppe carries on.

Yesterday my mother, Mama Helen, and Miss Nancy loaded up in Mama Helen’s car (she had it cleaned just for the occasion) and headed to The Sock Shoppe. Once the shopping was done, Mama Helen realized that she’s paid $11.99 for ONE pair of socks, so she marched right back into the store and got her money back, losing her billfolder somewhere along the way. But it’s not as bad as it could be given that she keeps all her money, identification cards, and credit cards somewhere else.

Hearing about their trip to The Sock Shoppe reminded me of one my cousin Stacy’s favorite stories . . .

One Christmas Grandmother Ballard talked Granddaddy into driving her down to The Sock Shoppe to do her Christmas shopping. Once she’d bought each child and grandchild a pair of socks, she shopped for Granddaddy’s present.

On Christmas morning, Granddaddy opened his present from Grandmother, held up his new underwear, and asked, “Katie Belle. Are these from you?”

“What?” Grandmother hollered back across the room. She was a little hard of hearing.

“I said, are these from you?” Granddaddy hollered a little louder.

With that, Grandmother sat back in her chair, let loose a chuckle, and said, “Of course they’re new, William.”

Okay, she was a lot hard of hearing.

~~~~~~~

IOOL4 14

In Our Own Language 4:14

Nancy (my developmentally disabled sister-in-law) draws.
I (the woman who flat-out loves her) stitch her drawings.

~~~~~~~

Dailydahlia16sep15

The Daily Dahlia

~~~~~~~

Thank you for joining me on my story quest.
To see more of the Daily Dahlias, join me on Facebook or Instagram.
And if you want to keep up with these 100 Stories in 100 Days
or my stitchings,
just mash the black “right this way” button in the orange bar
at the top of the screen and follow the directions.

46: What a Woman Wants Sometimes Has Little To Do With Logic. Or Age. Or What Anybody Else Wants Them to Want.

JeanneNancy copy

1

The second year I was a Chambers, Nancy (who was then 15 years old) wanted a doll for Christmas.

“No,” declared her dad. “You’re too old for a doll.”

Her mother turned to me with tears in her eyes.

“I’ll handle this,” I assured my mother-in-law, and that fine Christmas morning found not one but two dolls under the tree for Nancy – one a big girl doll, the other a baby doll. Nancy’s joy was obvious, and my mother-in-law’s gratitude was palpable.

What about Mr. C you ask? Well, I like to think Mr. Chambers and I learned something about each other that year.

NancyAtStewartHomeSchool3 copy

2

Several years later, Nancy was a resident at Stewart Home School in Frankfort, KY. The Engineer and I attended Parents’ Weekend, spending the days on campus and taking Nancy with us to spend nights in the hotel room. We talked non-stop, Nancy and I did. Talked and talked and talked.

Now back then, Nancy would get fixated on one subject and kinda’ wear it out. That particular weekend, she was keen on talking about what good care she took of Baker and Terry Lynn – how she helped them in the shower, how she brushed their teeth, how she put them in the bed.

When we checked her in with her dorm mother at the end of that weekend, I asked Ms. Catherine if I could meet Baker and Terry Lynn. Giving me a puzzled look, she asked “Why do you want to meet them?”

“Because Nancy and I have spent three days talking about them. I know how important they are to Nancy, and I’d just like to meet them.”

“Follow me,” she said, and we headed off down the hallway, stopping at the foot of Nancy’s bed. “This right here is Baker,” Ms. Catherine said, patting a big stuffed polar bear on the head, “and Terry Lynn has been dead for about 12 years.”

I had spent the entire long weekend talking relatively intelligently – at least continuously – about a stuffed animal and a dead person.

That’s when I knew for sure I was a writer.

NancyJeanneBaby2014

3

To this day, Nancy loves her “babies”. When she started spending her days at the ARC a couple of years ago, I got a call from her teacher informing me that Nancy was regularly taking a classmate’s baby doll without permission, which, of course, upset the classmate. “We issue Amber Alerts when we see Nancy headed that way or catch her with the baby doll in her hands, but we just can’t continue like this and wondered if you could shed some light on this,” Mona kinda pleaded.

I told Mona about Nancy’s affinity for babies, how she likes to “take good care of them”, then promised to get a baby doll for Nancy that could live at the ARC. Every morning when Nancy arrives, Mona gets Nancy’s baby down from the top of the metal storage cabinet, and Nancy grabs the baby by the throat and slams places her on the table at her place. At the end of the day, Mona returns Nancy’s baby to the top of the cabinet, tucking her in for the night, and Nancy returns home to check on the 72 or so babies that wait for her on her bed. And in her chair. And on her dresser. And in her closet.

~~~~~~~

IOOL4 14

In Our Own Language 4:14

Nancy (my developmentally disabled sister-in-law) draws.
I (the woman who flat-out loves her) stitch.

~~~~~~~

Dailydahlia150915

The Daily Dahlia

~~~~~~~

Thank you for joining me on my story quest.
To see more of the Daily Dahlias, join me on Facebook or Instagram.
And if you want to subscribe to these 100 Stories in 100 Days,
just mash the black “right this way” button in the orange bar
at the top of the screen and follow the directions.

45: The Time I Almost Didn’t Get The Job I Was Born To Do

5thGrade

Now I may have closed out fifth grade on a high note, what with taking over science class and all, but it had a rocky start, that year did, because I landed in the homeroom of a foreigner called Mrs. Wooten. I think we can all agree that because she came over from Clayton County (20 minutes to the east of us), she had no way of knowing that I was the perennial Teacher’s Pet.

I had never had to earn the title of Teacher’s Pet – my reputation simply preceded me each year. But Mrs. Wooten was a hard nut to crack. I pulled out all the stops: wore my most adorable dresses; took my time to make sure my writing was legible; brought extra goodies in my lunchbox and made sure I was seen sharing with those around me; left love notes on her desk, chair, chalk rack; kicked every day off with compliments about her hair, her dress, her shoes – something; made sure her chalkboard and erasers were always clean; made sure my desk was always neat and my eyes were always on her – I left no stone unturned, and was still treated like Everybody Else.

Except for Junior M. Nobody was treated like Junior M. Only Junior M. was treated like Junior M. I’m guessing his shoes had something to do with it because Mrs. Wooten told us on the very first day that you could tell all you needed to know about a person by the condition of their shoes. Mrs. Wooten didn’t take well to scuffed shoes, and she could not abide nicknames. She didn’t care if “Junior” was a family nickname of long standing, she simply would not stand for nicknames being used in her classroom. Period. Turns out Junior’s real name was Oliver, and with that revelation, every fifth grader in that room positioned themselves firmly behind Junior.

I did everything but get letters of reference from previous teachers to convince Mrs. Wooten to anoint appoint me her Teacher’s Pet, and when all else failed, I brought in the Big Guns: my mother.

Though I didn’t exactly give Mother all the details . . . well, actually, I kind of told her that Mrs. Wooten didn’t like me and I had no idea why because I thought that presented a more urgent situation. Sure enough, my mother told them at the office that she’d be in late the next morning, and when she drove me to school, she parked that airplane carrier-sized Oldsmobile, and walked in with me. Right down to Mrs. Wooten’s room we went, and i couldn’t decide whether I felt smug or scared.

I needn’t have worried because my mother knew exactly how to get me the job of Teacher’s Pet my teacher to like me: she went bearing gifts. Not only did she wear my favorite pink and white sleeveless shirtwaist dress with the 2-toned high heels and sharp toes, my Mother delivered a gift wrapped present to Mrs. Wooten: a copy of a book called Take Time! by Charles Allen, a book Mrs. Wooen apparently loved because before Mother had time to get to her car, I was in like Flynn.

Every Friday afternoon we’d push the desks against the four walls, pull out the record player, and square dance the afternoon away because as Mrs. Wooten said repeatedly, “We [the teachers] get paid to be here, but they [the students] don’t.” I think I can safely speak for my classmates when I say that we didn’t really require a reason, but the justification sure seemed to make her feel better.

In mid-October at our Teacher/Teacher’s Pet weekly planning meeting, Mrs. Wooten brought up the Christmas party. A woman who believed in planning ahead, she suggested we have a Christmas Around the World Party with every student choosing a country to research and represent. With that, she reached into a bag and pulled out her Authentic Moo-Moo and handed it to me, saying I could wear it when I represented Hawaii.

The morning of the party – Friday, 12/20 – the phone woke us up. It was my Aunt Rene calling to tell us that she couldn’t wake my Granddaddy Hewell up. He had died in his sleep, my Granddaddy Hewell had, and because they couldn’t be sure whether he died before or after midnight, the family opted to make his official death date 12/19, the same date his 18 year old son died years earlier when a tractor flipped over on him.

I was devastated at the loss of my granddaddy and I wasn’t too happy to be missing the Christmas Around the World Party. Mother checked with her friends, and they agreed that I should go to the party since it was after lunch, so I went, but I didn’t feel much like wearing Mrs. Wooten’s size XXXXL moo-moo. She said she understood, and other than that, the only thing I can remember about the party is how touched I was with so many of my fifth grade classmates – Gordon K. was the first – telling me how sorry they were to hear about my granddaddy.

Fifth grade was also the year I started writing songs, but that’ll keep till tomorrow. You know, there’s a line in an Anne Rice book that describes a character as walking like someone who had once been cherished. If I ever did walk that walk, it’s because of my Granddaddy Hewell.

~~~~~~~

It’s just been brought to my attention that story #41 ran into technical difficulties and didn’t go out to subscribers.

~~~~~~~

Nancy and I are honored to be included in a book of irrepressible artists who create despite their handicaps. Anne Copeland and Barbara Williamson have put together a beautiful book of beautiful art, and they’ve launched a kickstarter campaign to raise funds to get the first run of books printed. Click here to be whisked to the kickstarter page and have a look. Support them as you can and will – financially, by helping spread the word, or both. Any way you can support these two women who have spilled an awful lot of goodness into the world, will be hugely appreciated.

~~~~~~~

IOOL4 13a

In Our Own Language 4:13

Nancy (my developmentally disabled sister-in-law) draws.
I (the woman who flat-out loves her) stitch.

~~~~~~~

DailyDahlia091415

The Daily Dahlia
(This one is home grown!)

To see more of the Daily Dahlias, join me on Facebook or Instagram.
And if you want to subscribe to these 100 Stories in 100 Days,
just mash the black “right this way” button in the orange bar
at the top of the screen and follow the directions.

44: Student Teaching . . . Literally

Ourearthworkbook

We started changing classes in fifth grade, and maybe that made the science teacher think we were too old for experiments and switch us over to a menu of lectures and tests. Whatever the reason, I found it dry, boring, and with every word she uttered, I saw dust flying out of her mouth. So I did what any fifth-grade girl would do: I volunteered to take over the teaching responsibilities.

Using my science book as an outline, I’d go home every day after school and turn our kitchen into my science lab, concocting all sorts of hands-on experiments. Because I couldn’t bribe the teacher to loan me her teacher’s book and it being before the internet and all, I had to conjure up my own experiments. And let me tell you what: there would be no banal and commonplace volcanoes exploding during my reign tenure.

One of my finest, if I do say so myself, demonstration was illustrating how mountains are formed. Here’s what I did, in case you want to try it yourself at home: I mixed up a batch of orange jello and poured a little bit in the bottom of a glass bread pan then put it in the fridge to set up. Next I mixed up some lime Jello, poured a little bit over the congealed orange Jello, and put it in the fridge to set up. Then I mixed up some grape Jello (my favorite, next to Cherry and Watermelon), poured a little over the top of the lime Jello, and set the glass bread pan in the fridge to set up. While it was in the refrigerator, I went out to the barn and found a board, a saw, and my daddy to operate the saw cutting the board down to a size that would fit in the end of the glass bread pan. Obviously I’d already studied about how mountains are formed, so I made notes containing the highlights of what I wanted to say then loaded up some wax paper, paper towels, my notes, and the board in my briefcase green overnight bag.

The next morning, I retrieved the glass bread pan from the fridge, set it inside my bag, and headed out to school. During science glass (which was fortunately second period because the lunchroom women didn’t have room in the fridge for my science experiments), I gave a little talk about mountains, then pushed that board in one end of the glass bread pan and started pushing it towards the other end, causing the layers of jello to rise and ripple just like mountains do.

Turns out I should’ve brought the entire box of wax paper and two entire rolls of paper towels.

Once I built up a little confidence in my teaching abilities, I created (with a little lot of help from Daddy again) a multi-media extravaganza light-up board. Just the thought of that thing brings tears to my eyes. Those wires covered in red and green. those words and photos cut from magazines, that piece of paneling I sanded and stained, the hinge Daddy and I developed so the board would stand alone, those adorable little tiny light bulbs I took from every flashlight I could find. It was one of my finest, that’s for sure.

Another time on the eve of the earth chapter, I was walking through Alford’s when I spied a workbook that covered just about everything I wanted to cover in that segment. So the next day, after showing the class my copy of the workbook, I proposed that everybody bring in 59-cents for me to buy additional copies for them. They did, I did, and I don’t know about my classmates-turned-students, but I loved that workbook with all it’s color illustrations and fill-in-the-blank questions like you wouldn’t believe.

You’re probably wondering what final grade I got in science that year. Well, here you go:

ReportCardGrade5

Personally, I think I deserved an A+ – maybe even an A+++ – but, alas, grading and doing report cards didn’t fall under my student teaching responsibilities.

~~~~~~~

Dear Reader,
Please excuse Jeanne for being a day late with story #44. She was so tired yesterday, that she laid down for a nap at 4:15 p.m. and didn’t wake up till 10:30 this morning.
Signed,
Jeanne Herself

43: The House That Jeanne Built

110VictoriaPlace

In another lifetime when the children were about 5 and 6 years old, we bought the shell of a house and set about finishing it. It was bigger than we needed – 4 floors, if you count the basement – so, being the girl I am, I created a schedule, giving each contractor an entire floor to work on then rotating them through the other floors. That schedule was a beautiful thing to behold, if I do say so myself. Framable.

But sometimes on paper is the only place things look good.

Things rolled along nicely for the first two or three weeks, then one morning the finishing carpenters, who were slated to come in and finish the crown molding on the first floor, didn’t show up. I started calling. No answer. No voicemail. No calls from them to explain. By the thirteenth day, I was beyond frustrated, but not knowing what else to do, I let my fingers do some more walking on the telephone, and this time somebody picked up. “Hello?” a female voice said.

“Hello. This is Jeanne Hewell-Chambers. Is Jim available?”

“No, he isn’t. This is his mother. Can I take a message?” she asked, and with that, the dam broke. Tears flowed as I told her between sobs that I’d been waiting on Jim for two weeks. He’d promised he’d be here in two weeks and figured he’d need about two weeks to get finished, and I hadn’t heard from him since. Now my schedule was getting all messed up because it was about time for the carpet and hardwood floor people to come in, but they couldn’t possibly lay down flooring with Jim and his crew working on scaffolding to finish the crown molding.

“When do you want him there?” she asked.

“Tomorrow morning would be fine,” I told her. “I get here at 7 to get ready for everybody.”

“Jim will be there at 7,” she assured me. But he wasn’t – he was there at quarter till 7, and he showed up every morning and worked till quitting time until that beautiful crown molding was in. Took him about five days.

From then on, I never waited more than 30 minutes on anybody. After half an hour, I’d start calling and when somebody answered, I led with “Hello. My name is Jeanne Hewell-Chambers, and I’m calling for Bob’s wife or mother.”

~~~~~~~

Finally it was time for the carpet to be laid, something I’d saved it till last for obvious reasons. I’d been rear-ended while stopped at a traffic light, and the soreness just wouldn’t seem to go away.

The morning the carpet layers were to come, I got to the house early and soreness or no, moved everything (paint, boards, boxes of nails, 5-gallon buckets, ladders, and such) into the garage so they could cut the carpet in the great room where it would stay dry if the predicted rain did come. I was tired but pleased when they showed up an hour late. The man in charge of the crew walked behind me as I showed him around and told him about my plan and how I’d moved everything into the garage in case it rained.

He spat his toothpick out onto the ground, glared at me, and said, “We will not cut the carpet in this room, we will cut it in the garage. Now we’re going to breakfast, and if you don’t have the garage cleaned out when we get back, we’re going home and you can call us when you’re ready for us to come back down.” And they turned to leave.

“What?” I asked. “Wait. I thought I was doing something good for y’all – saving you the time and effort to clear a place to work. A dry place where neither the carpet or y’all will get wet.”

“I’ve told you what to do,” he said, “if I was you, I’d get to work. We eat fast.”

That, my friends, was the camel that broke my last straw.

I called The Engineer, who was at his office an hour away, and told him what had just happened. I also told him that I was leaving, that I wouldn’t be here when these fellas got back, that I’d had it. I’d absolutely had it. I was tired of having workers from other houses in the neighborhood stopping by to tell me how my people were doing it all wrong, I was tired of having to fetch these men drinks and food. I was tired of having to wait on people and call their wives and mothers to get them to do what they were hired to do. I was tired of having them pressure me to pay them at noon on Friday, something I wouldn’t do because I’d already learned that if I paid them early on Friday, I didn’t see them again till Monday afternoon or Tuesday morning when they’d sobered up. I was leaving. I didn’t care if this house never got finished. I was leaving, and I didn’t know when I’d be back. “Stick a fork in me,” I told him, “cause I’m done.”

And being as good as my word, I left.

I stayed gone about an hour – just long enough to stop crying – then I headed back to the house. There on the top step, sat The Engineer and the carpet laying foreman, laughing it up like they were old buddies while the worker bees were inside, cutting carpet . . . in the room I’d cleared for them that very morning.

It took them about four days to finish laying the carpet, and the carpet man said not another word to me the entire time. Nothing at all. They arrived in the morning and walked straight past me without so much as a nod in my direction. They left for lunch without a word, returned from lunch without a word, left at the end of the day without a word. The only time the man spoke to me again was when they’d completed the job. He handed me the bill and told me who to make the check out to. I wrote the check – entered the payee’s name, the date, the amount. I even wrote our new address on the memo line. I filled out everything on that check, but I didn’t sign it. Without uttering a sound, I handed him the check and turned to leave.

“Wait a minute,” carpet man said brusquely, shoving the check back at me. “You need to sign this check.”

“Oh, do I now?” I said coolly. “I tell you what. I’ll sign that check for you when you apologize to me.”

“Apologize for what?” I swear, he seemed genuinely surprised.

“For the way you talked to me when you first got here and for the way you’ve behaved every day since. Let me ask you something: who hired you?” I asked him.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, who is the one who initiated contact with you, interviewed you, called you back to say you had the job? Who is the one who was here waiting for you the day you were supposed to show up an hour and half earlier than you did? Who is the one who’s been here every day when you arrived, having the house open and ready for you to get right to work?”

“Y’all did.”

“Oh no, no, no,” I cut him off. “You think about that again. There’s no ‘y’all’ that comes into play here. Think about it and answer my question.”

Finally, with his hands on his hips, he said reluctantly, “You did.”

“Damn right,” I said. “It was me. I found you. I hired you, I’ve been here every day when y’all got here. I’ve been here to lock up after you left. I’m the one who cleared the room you’re working from to keep you and my beautiful carpet dry. I am also the one you talked so ugly to, the one you treated so badly. When I got back that day, you were looking my husband in the eye and smiling and talking and carrying-on like y’all were best friends. My husband didn’t hire you, and not only is he not here to sign your check, he’s not going to come to sign your check. I am going to sign your check, but not until I get an apology from you.”

I stood there, prepared to wait till hell froze over.

“But my wife has brain cancer,” he blurted out.

“I’m so sorry to hear that. How long has she had it?”

“About nine months.”

“And when did I first call you? Never mind. I’ll tell you: I called you two and a half months ago. She had brain cancer then, and you were downright friendly to me – at least compared to the way you’ve behaved on the job – cause you were trying to get this job. Since then, you’ve behaved very badly. And while I’m sorry about your wife, I’m appalled you would use her as an excuse for your unacceptable behavior.”

After several minutes, he apologized . . . to his toes.

“Not good enough,” I said. “You have to look at me – look me in the eyes – and you better sound convincing cause my ink pen stays in my pocketbook till you do.”

Eventually it became clear that while I might hear the words, I’d have to forego the sincere delivery if I wanted to sleep in my own bed that night, so I signed the check.

I’ve not had carpet in a house since.

« Older posts Newer posts »